OK, OK I admit it! I enjoy sending those "mushy" emotional, "we'll be friends forever" type emails to my friends, because ... Well, that's how I feel about them and I want them to know it! But a few weeks back, my best friend sent me an email that is a bit, uhmmm, different ... lol! I scanned it quicky, as I'm want to do, and then had to stop and reread it slowly.
Upon first read, all I saw was the humor; but then the twisted truth hit me. Take it at face; or dive into the depths ... either way, to my friends and YOU know who YOU are ....
1) When you are sad - I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the sorry bastard who made you sad.
2) When you are blue - I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.
3) When you smile - I will know you finally got laid.
4) When you are scared - I will rag on you about it every chance I get.
5) When you are worried - I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and tell you to quit whining.
6) When you are confused - I will use little words.
7) When you are sick - Stay the hell away from me until you are well again. I don't want whatever it is you have.
8) When you fall - I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass. (Ah! Well, my friends will know that this is assbackwards as I am the one most likely to fall ... LOL!)
S. W. A. K.